Many of us long for and search for the Breakthrough. We study books, attend classes, go to spiritual retreats, and watch inspirational videos on YouTube. We have deep conversations with friends, and search, search, search for the moment of enlightenment—the moment where what we know in our head clicks with what our subconscious believes.
Many people do experience breakthroughs and describe it as the one moment that changed their life. Maybe they point to a specific event, retreat, a passage in a book, a conversation, or something they observed—a single event in time when everything condensed and clicked.
Having struggled with depression and anxiety, as well as low self-esteem, for years, I wanted a breakthrough, too. Especially in the midst of depression. I wanted to wake up, have everything click, see the solution, have my breakthrough. And I desperately needed it now.
What I’ve learned over the years is that a lot of change—especially big change—happens slowly. There may not be a single moment where everything clicks. Things begin to click. Then they click more. And more. And more. Until suddenly you realized both your conscious and subconscious, as well as your emotions, your creative knowing, and your body sense are in alignment.
With something like depression or anxiety, that can take years. Years! I have moments of apparent breakthrough, followed by moments where I think to myself, “Woops! Just kidding. That wasn’t a breakthrough. I’m lost again.”
All this to say if you haven’t found a breakthrough, that’s normal. If you never find a breakthrough, that’s normal, too. Sometimes change comes slowly. It ebbs and flows. It harmonizes and descends into chaos. Slowly, the harmony strengthens and the times of chaos decrease (even if they occasionally spike up as powerfully as when you first began!).
My best advice here is to keep pushing and learning. When I say pushing, I don’t mean forcing. You can’t force your subconscious and conscious to agree. What you can do, is keep reading articles or listening to music that keeps whatever it is you want assimilated in the back of your brain. Slowly, slowly, it percolates down from conscious to subconscious (or the other way around!).
This is the reality of breaking through. Instead of despairing (as I did when I was in the throes of depression and learned getting out could take years), take heart in the fact you are not alone, your experience is normal and even healthy, and keep striding forward, even if all you can do at the moment is recite mantras or read articles or study. Remember even though assimilation may take a long time, change occurs during that time, and even a little change can be a big relief. You don’t necessarily have to wait years for that.
Also understand you may have many breakthroughs, not just one, as the process of assimilation is often gradual. You may think, “Now I understand!” multiple times, then doubt yourself moments or days later. That’s okay. Keep going, and know it’s normal to have multiple breakthroughs before you reach a more balanced assimilation.
I hope this post finds you well and gives you the courage to trust yourself, love yourself, and celebrate where you are now. Best wishes, my friends! ❤
What Do You Think?: Have you ever experienced a breakthrough? What happened afterward? What was it like? Have you ever experienced a more gradual assimilation? What was that like? How can you honor where you are now?